How you can help

Many are asking how you can help:

PRAYER!!!!! Specifically for:

Ansley's development (brain and eyes)

~ and all that goes with this

Feeding (suck/swallow)

Wisdom for doctors

Best care plan

Financial peace and wisdom as I'm currently not working in order to take care of fancy pants.

Financially:

We set up a paypal for those who would like to financially donate. All $ goes towards replacing my income and different items needed for Ansley's development. Benkatierice@gmail.com (no fees), or a gofundme at 

http://www.gofundme.com/f3a2n0

Thank you and SPARKLE ON! 

New diagnosis

Went to the ophthomologist today and they Doctors said Ansley has cortical vision impairment (which we guessed due to LISS) as well as optic nerve hypoplasia (main problem).

Optic nerve hypoplasia (ONH) is a congenital condition in which the optic nerve is underdeveloped (small) She has limited vision (she does see lights!), and we were referred to the Fl School for the Deaf&Blind for vision therapy. They aren't sure how much she will actually see as she grows. There currently is no treatment, just therapy to try and get nerve to strengthen. I left feeling discouraged and overwhelmed, got in the car and heard "all to Jesus I surrender". We are giving this ALL to HIM. Whatever the outcome he has a plan and purpose for Ansley's fancy life. 

This is the update I posted earlier on IG/FB. It is super scary. Along with the lissencephaly, microcephaly now dealing with vision impairment. Overwhelming is an understatement. A ton of questions going thru our heads. How will she develop? Are we equipped to handle this? Will she ever see us? So many questions. We do know that God is 100% in control. He has her life already planned out. He made NO mistake with her. She's perfect. His own image. :).

Please continue to pray. We need them! Please pray for her health. Please pray for her to grow and develop. Please pray for patience & guidance for us as we determine the best care plan for Ansley. We love you all and thank you for your prayers and love for our fancy girl!!! SPARKLE ON!

http://www.gofundme.com/f3a2n0 

Back to the gym

I'm headed back to the gym tomorrow morning (6:00 am, before Ben goes to work). I haven't worked out in 6 weeks!!! I'm hoping my body will readjust to working out quickly. I have gained 7 pounds since we got Ansley. It is what it is. Time to pick back up. Not starting crossfit quite yet, as we are very limited on funds, so trying a local gym by my house. I found a workout plan online for in the gym and tomorow is leg day!!! Here goes nothing. Ready to SPARKLE ON for my fancy Ansley :) 

Current stats:

Weight: 187

Pants size: 12

And then there were 3...

So Ben and I have been trying to start a family for 6 years. For the first 4 years, We started with infertility treatments and then quit. I was DONE. We were trying to find peace in it being just the two of us. "Me & you, just us two". Then we felt led to adopt. That was a PROCESS and after leaving the hospital empty handed (see our Adoption Story post), we were back to "me & you, just us two". It was a horrible, grim experience but we we're determined to NOT let it draw us apart. We sought The Lord, both individually and as a couple. We prayed for our marriage, we prayed for peace and most importantly we prayed for Ansley.

And then Ansley came!!!!!! It was so unexpected we didn't have time to think, much less "prepare". We were thrown in as parents. We have had to learn to adjust (we are still learning!!!) as parents and as husband and wife. It's not just us two. We now have this precious DEMANDING diva! It has been so sweet seeing our dreams come true as a family. There have also been obstacles learning to adjust to it not just being us two! Were both exhausted and that causes emotions to run crazy. We've had to learn we can't just go to dinner at 10 pm, we can't do crossfit every night/all night like we used to (at least for now), we've had to learn to adjust our lifestyle. 

With unexpected baby comes unexpected maternity leave. Learning to adjust to one income has been the hardest. We never fought about money, I won't say we fight now, but it's definitely more tense when it comes to our finances. 

All this being said, we wouldn't change this for the world. We are sooooo blessed by Ansley. She is so fancy and the love of our lives!!! We love this new lifestyle of being parents. It's exhausting, yes, I won't lie but it's AMAZING!!!! When she looks at you and smiles it lights up the whole room. Our hearts are full!!

Side note: several have emailed asking how they can make a monetary donation for Fancy girl. We've created a "gofundme", as I think that will be the easiest. http://link.email.dynect.net/link.php?H=qBOBTgXouCZdO5t3GY2KOjXlNMQdALHb%2FH7ZDewSQF3BeJQxow71fDz8PAw2hkIV291R3Bg03oj47t9SvmcIfGn94tIwd%2Ft7503p5qagdNQ%3D&G=21&R=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.gofundme.com%2Ff3a2n0&I=20140926211849.0AC7490DC63F%40mail6-02-ewr.dyndns.com&X=MHw3NzY2NjI6VEVNUElEXzQ5OzF8Nzc2NjYzOlFVRVVFSURfMTYyNDMyODcyOw%3D%3D

Thank you

Just wanted to say thank you so very very much for all the encouragement and prayers. And thank you for all the blessings! So sweet how many of you have sent little things for Ansley Claire. So so sweet. 

For those asking if they can donate our PayPal is benkatierice@gmail.com.

We appreciate it all and know and trust that The Lord provides ALL things. 

The Diagnosis

We noticed Lady A was super stiff when we got her. I mean stiff as a board and would "twitch" every once in a while. Thru working with her and loving her she has "loosened" up and becoming much more flexible. 

We were sitting on the couch with her one day and she started "twitching" for 4 minutes. Not violently shaking like you think when you think of seizures. But more of stiffening her whole body then relaxing, repeating that for 4 minutes. Very very scary. Took her to the ER and were able to get a MRI & EEG which diagnosed her with Lissencephaly and the EEG showed these "twitches" were infantile spasms (baby seizure). 

Lissencephaly, which literally means “smooth brain,” is a rare, gene-linked brain malformation characterized by the absence of normal convolutions (folds) in the cerebral cortex and an abnormally small head (microcephaly).  Lissencephaly is caused by defective neuronal migration during embryonic development,  the process in which nerve cells move from their place of origin to their permanent location within the cerebral cortex gray matter. Symptoms of the disorder may include unusual facial appearance, difficulty swallowing, failure to thrive, muscle spasms, seizures, and severe psychomotor retardation.

The spasms are due to the LISS. We are approaching a treatment for then with a high dosage of steroids. Hoping it keeps them at bay and then we will reassess as this is not a long term solution. 

We are now scheduling EarlySteps to come out and assess her development and figure out a plan for her, working with ophtomology to get her "lazy eye" working so baby girl can see and following up with Neuro.

It's scary. Scary to have a "special needs" child. Scared of the unknown. What if she doesn't develop past where she's at? What if she never walks? Never talks? 

All this being said, and all these fears, GOD MADE HER PERFECT. She is his perfect image. She is no mistake. There is nothing "wrong" with her. She is fearfully and wonderfully made and we are blessed to be her parents. We are blessed that God put us together to be a family and honor him. Whatever we have to face we know that God has this already mapped out, he has a special plan for her life. 

Adopting Lady A

We were matched with a BirthMom in September of 2013.  We went thru her entire pregnancy with her and met with her. She seemed to be totally "in it" and seemed dissassociated with the baby (in her belly). Telling us it was "our baby", yada yada. We left feeling very optimistic. Then the day came! The day A was being born!!! We couldn't be more excited. We packed everything up and went to the hospitals, our families waited with us while BM was having c section. We waited and waited and waited. Then the nurse came out and grabbed our adoption specialist and we knew something was wrong. Our AS came up to us and told us our BM has changed her mind. I fell to the floor. My husband and I, along with our families just sobbed. Was the worst moment of my life. We left and tried to grieve. The 4 months following that were awful. We tried to grieve and move on but we couldn't. We packed up the nursery and closed the door.

Early August we got a call saying our BM has changed her mind, then she started asking for $$, which we weren't comfortable with as we went thru the pregnancy with her and left with empty hearts. At this point we literally gave it ALL to The Lord. We were praying for contenment for the two of us.
Then two weeks later we got a call from our attorney saying "BM is on the way to sign papers and bringing baby!", 2 hours later we got another call "BM signed papers, come get your baby!!!!" I fell over. I jumped out of the shower, called my husband and said "I'm going to get our baby!". It was a whirlwind of emotions and our lives have been changed ever since!
It's so funny Ben went to work that morning and that afternoon had a 4 month old baby! We are so in love with our fancy Ansley :)